


Boys will be boys...

by babyduckie484



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Community: milliways_bar, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-01
Updated: 2012-06-05
Packaged: 2017-11-06 13:15:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/419323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyduckie484/pseuds/babyduckie484
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jasper and Emmett want to get drunk. There is only way place to try this. Milliways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ladyoflorien](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyoflorien/gifts).



It was time for Emmett to get married. (The again is implied) What isn’t cool is as many bachelor parties as he’s had he’s never been able to come to the wedding hung-over. In many ways he misses being able to get drunk.

Of course he’s only got one ‘family’ member that’s ever had the pleasure of being intoxicated. So being that he grabs Jasper and heads to the one spot they have a prayer of getting soused at.

Jasper looks over at him. “Emmett I appreciate the idea of our quest but I’m just not seeing how this can happen.” He said slowly his voice sounding more like Texas than normal.

Emmett rolls his eyes. “Jazz you have to miss being able to let loose a little. Besides for some reason this place is empty you can’t turn a human in to a munchies.” His accent more of the south as he smiles at Jasper.

“Emmett, that’s not funny. Okay maybe a little but, I’m just not sure it’s going to work. After all we tried just drinking last time you got married. We got nothing but really cold booze when we had to throw it up because we can’t digest it.”

“I know that JAZZ!” he said on a sigh. “If it wasn’t for your wife, or our brother we could have tried our other idea of taking a nip of drunk murderers. But noooo they have their visions.”

“I told you the problem with that was red eyes and I don’t know how you react drunk and I’m not having you hopped up on human blood drunk. I couldn’t control you if you got crazy.”

“I KNOW! I agreed it wasn’t the best idea even if it was tempting.” Emmett pouts before he gets another idea. “What if we get a deer drunk then nibble on it.”

Sure he’s about crazy because that almost makes sense. “Okay, you got me but how do we get the deer drunk? Emmett and please no craziness that is farfetched”

“No, you take hooch and you soak the watermelons in it and we lay them out let the deer eat the melon then we eat the deer.”

Jasper looks at him. “I must be crazy because that makes sense okay let’s do this.”

They ask the bar for watermelon, and everclear. Breaking the melons in half they each set about soaking the flesh with the booze. Once they are sure they have them soaked and finished they take them out and set them out back and wait.

Even if he doesn’t get drunk Emmett’s sure this will go down as one of his best bachelor parties.

Even if he doesn’t realize this until later.

 

TBC maybe Still deciding if they get success again.and if so what happens back home.


	2. Boys are Still Boys.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is what happens after Boys Will be Boys. The drinking the fun stuff. Yeah and a Exploding bunny. Again only in Milliways.

 

The worse part about crazy ideas isn’t if they don’t work it’s if they do. Like if you think for your bachelor party it’s a good idea to get drunk. And you do. Even when you didn’t really expect it to work. When we last saw Jasper and Emmett they were getting deer drunk to get drunk. The problem is it may have worked.

An hour later Jasper and Emmett are leaning against trees having had their drinks. Looking at each other trying to decide if they were actually drunk or just giddy from having fun.

“Emmett, I don’t know that I feel any different. What if we didn’t let it go through their system long enough. Or deer just don’t get drunk?” Of course it had been a long time since Jasper had known what it was like to feel drunk. The twang of Texas stronger than it normally was.

“I don’t know Jazzer” He said not exactly realizing he had called him ‘Jazzer’ “Maybe we just didn’t give them enough hooch. Because I think we should have felt the effects by now. Maybe we should just go home and pretend we didn’t try this?” And yet the slow drawl of Tennessee is stronger. Getting up he stumbles a bit not his normal grace as he then blinks. “I could have been wrong.”

Jasper stands up and then puts his hand on the tree ignoring the indention he was leaving as he leans against it. “I think we were wrong. Okay thing is we should have thought this through a little better.  We can do accidental damage without realizing it. And I don’t want to have to pay to fix stuff” A bit of bark falls on his shoe when he moves his hand.

Emmett thinking about this puts his hands on his waist then decides that’s too Rose like and crosses them over his chest. “That’s true. I don’t think we should tear stuff up but we can go for a swim. That’s bound to be safe and let us enjoy our buzz with out to much trouble.”

Jasper thinking about it nods his approval. “I don’t see how that will hurt anything lets go to the lake.” He goes to take a step not seeing the bit of bark fly off or land against the demon bunny. But he sees the glowing red eyes now. “EMMETT! Is that rabbit’s eye’s glowing red? Tell me that it’s just the drunken deer blood.”

Looking over Emmett leans his head to the side nodding. “Well if it’s the deer blood mine was tainted too because it’s—“ What he was going to say is lost in the explosion of the bunny. He blinks in shock. It takes a couple seconds for him to find words. “Holy shit! Did that bunny just explode?”

It’s one thing to get Emmett excitable but Jasper nods slowly feeling a bit shocked himself. “Yes, yes it did. I don’t know what did that but I think we need to go home now. Before we do something else wrong.” He said firmly. Silently praying Emmett agreed knowing he couldn’t make him go home unless he wanted to. And hoping that they could get out before seeing a human, not sure how good his control is in this state also knowing he couldn’t stop Emmett if there was a _Singer_ in the bar.

Emmett nods and agrees as he grabs his arm holding his breath as they walk back through the bar and end up in the garage before he takes a breath. “Now can we avoid Rosie and Alice is the real question.”

Jasper laughs as he then gets a pillow down of a rack and then hands one to Emmett. “We’ll just lay here until it passes. It’s not like we can get a hangover right?”

 


End file.
